“Upside-down death spikes/ like sitting on loaded guns/ a chair with wooden legs.”

“If I had a wooden leg I could sit on three-legged chairs no problem.”

“You are holding a loaded gun, you idiot. Act like it.”

“As I was sitting in my chair,I knew the bottom wasn't there,Nor legs nor back, but I just sat,Ignoring little things like that.”

“The four legs of the chair never move, but what if the chair could run as fast as a cheetah? That would be one piece of leopard print furniture I’d love to sit on.”

“Love isn’t stackable and interlocking, like boxes or Legos. Love is like a one-legged man standing on a three-legged chair that is placed on top of a two-legged piano. I should know, because I’m the guy trying to tune that piano, fix that chair, and affix a prosthetic leg to that guy—who happens to be my piano teacher. Mr. Balloonky, you get down from there now!
”