“But then the subject turned to the spiritual life and Meg talked about her many visits to ashrams in India and her admiration for Swami Muktananda and Gurumayi. That got in the way, especially because he told her of his skepticism regarding the guru industry, and suggested she might profitably read Gita Mehta’s book Karma Cola. “Why are you so cynical?” she asked him, as if she genuinely wanted to know the answer, and he said that if you grew up in India it was easy to conclude that these people were fakes. “Yes, of course there are lots of charlatans,” she said, reasonably, “but can’t you discriminate?” He shook his head sadly. “No,” he said. “No, I can’t.” That was the end of their chat.”

“As he was about to leave, she said, "Murtagh."He paused and turned to regard her.She hesitated for a moment, then mustered her courage and said, "Why?" She thought he understood her meaning: Why her? Why save her, and now why try to rescue her? She had guessed at the answer, but she wanted to hear him say it.He stared at her for the longest while, and then, in a low, hard voice, he said, "You know why.”

“I--" She swallowed, perhaps summoning her courage, then continued, "I would not lie to you and say that I did not want this.""Me," he cut in peevishly. "You wanted me."She closed her eyes. “Yes,” she finally said, “I wanted you.”Part of him wanted to interrupt again, to remind her that she still wanted him, that it wasn’t and would never be in the past.“But I can’t have you,” she said quietly, “and because of that, you can’t have me.”And then, to his complete astonishment, he asked, “What if I married you?”

“She told Papa about it. He made her stick out her tongue and he felt her wrist. He shook his head sadly and said,"You have a bad case, a very bad case.""Of what?""Growing up.”

“Cash, you can’t have me, I’m not yours to have,” she told him, her voice now sounding a wee bit desperate. His mouth came back to hers and she felt that he was still smiling. “Oh yes, darling, you are,” he said there and he kissed her.”

“She said Robert Joyner had killed himself with a gun. And then I asked why, and then she told me that he was getting a divorce and was sad about it.''Lots of people get divorces and don't kill themselves,' I said.'I know,' she said, excitement in her voice. 'That's what I told her.”