“I don't do drugs. I am drugs.”

“Take me, I am the drug; take me, I am hallucinogenic”

“I am not strange. I am just not normal.”

“It is not necessary for the public to know whether I am joking or whether I am serious, just as it is not necessary for me to know it myself.”

“The sole difference between myself and a madman is the fact that I am not mad!”

“I do not understand why, when I ask for grilled lobster in a restaurant, I'm never served a cooked telephone.”

“Since I don't smoke, I decided to grow a mustache - it is better for the health.However, I always carried a jewel-studded cigarette case in which, instead of tobacco, were carefully placed several mustaches, Adolphe Menjou style. I offered them politely to my friends: "Mustache? Mustache? Mustache?"Nobody dared to touch them. This was my test regarding the sacred aspect of mustaches.”