“The baby boom produced a fresh batch of American youngsters -- teenagers they were called -- and they were suddenly coming of age. But until Roman Holiday, it was hard for them to see themselves in the movies. What Audrey offered -- namely to the girls -- was a glimpse of someone who lived by her own code of interests, not her mother's, and who did so with a wholesome independence of spirit.”

“Who exactly are we?' I asked.The American Dreamers. There aren't too many of us left.' I don't know if I qualify.' You an American? Or want to be an American?'I am an American.' You said you were having a dream.' It's true, I did.'Was it the one where you're inside the girl and you are pumping her and pumping her and you are so happy but then it turns out it's not a girl, it's really one of those super poisonous box jellyfish, and it stings you and you are screaming and screaming and the sky rains the diarrhea of babies?'The...no, I don't think so.' I get that sometimes. Anyway, see you around.”

“I hated guys that called girls baby. Baby was what you used when you didn't remember the girl's name or you were just too lazy to come up with your own nickname for her.”

“Ecstasy! In common parlance ecstasy is fun. But ecstasy is not fun. Your very soul is seized and shaken until it tingles. After all, who will choose to feel undiluted awe? The unknowing vulgar abuse the word; we must recapture its full and terrifying sense.”

“My favorite passage is from Rule: "I hated guys that called a girl "baby". Baby was what you used when you couldn't remember a girl's name or you were just too lazy to come up with your own nickname for her.”

“When you feel neglected, think of the female salmon, who lays 3,000,000 eggs but no one remembers her on Mother's Day”

“Interesting' people were her favorite hobby. She collected them: the type who did gay things late at night and smoked cigarettes in mixed company, those would have most scandalized her own mother.”