“All men fall under 5 categories: The assholes are by far the worst. Then there are the dumbasses, the smartasses, the sorryasses, and last but not least, the wiseasses”

“Two of my fav pieces of wisdom from Phoebe:- Men are like parking spots. All the good ones are taken, and those that aren't are inaccessible.- Remember, it's always better to be the smartass rather than the dumbass.”

“Compliments do not fall under the category of lies. They are merely good deeds unsupported by facts.”

“... That's why you're going directly back to the house. The last thing we need is for you to end up in jail again, and I'm quite certain disassembling another lady's hair falls under the category of assault.”

“A blanket can be a statement—a generalization and truism covering a multitude of categories, like corruption, ineptitude, ignorance, arrogance, greed, and sloth—which would all fall under the blanket of “Politics.”

“And be aware that people fall under one of two categories: they are either your brother and sister in faith, or they are your counterpart in humanity.”