“A winner smiles and a looser cries. The God looks at them and says,'Sorry, guys!”

“I would rather loose and feel like a winner then cheat and feel like a looser.”

“Athletes are born winners, there not born loosers, and the sooner you understand this, the faster you can take on a winning attitude and become sucessful in life.”

“I know a cute thing to say to a kid when they ask why it's raining. I say to them it's raining because god is crying. And if they ask why god is crying, a cute thing to say is, god is crying probably because of something you did.”

“When two evil guys fight in a duel,the worst of both will be the winner.”

“The driver's on me in an instant. She's crying and trembling. She grabs the front of my jacket and shakes me. "You crazy bitch!" she screams. "I could have killed you!""Sorry," I say"Sorry?" she shouts. "You don't look sorry. You-""Sorry you missed," I say.She lets go of me then. Takes a step back.”