“You and Wes," she said, triumphant, "are just likethis ."She was holding a book, a paperback romance. The title, emblazoned in gold across the cover, wasForbidden, and the picture beneath it was of a man in a pirate outfit, eye patch and all, clutching a small, extremelybusty woman to his chest. In the background, there was a deserted island surrounded by blue water."We're pirates?" I said.She tapped the book with one fingernail. "This story," she said, "is all about two people who can't be togetherbecause of other circumstances. But secretly, they pine and lust for each other constantly, the very fact thattheir love is forbidden fueling their shared passion.""Did you just make that up?""No," she said, flipping the book over to read the back cover. "It's right here! And it's totally you and Wes.You can't be together, which is exactly why you want to be. And why you can't admit it to us, because thatwould make it less secret and thus less passionate.”

“You can't be together, which is exactly why you want to be.”

“It's all about you, Colie." She touched one finger to her temple, tap tap tap. "Believe in yourself up here and it will make you stronger than you could ever imagine." There is something infectious about confidence. And for that one moment, with my eyebrows burning and my eyes watering, I believed. "And good hair never hurt either.”

“You said the other day life was long,' I shot back. 'Which is it?' 'It's both,' she said, shrugging. 'It all depends on how you choose to live it. It's like forever, always changing.'Kristy and Macy; p.135”

“And I think she works so much becasue she can be in control of it, you know?' I said. She nodded. 'It makes her feel, I don't know, safe.'I can understand that,' Delia said softly. 'Losing someone can make you feel very out of control. Totally so.' I know,' I said. 'But it's not really fair. Like, after my dad died, I wanted to be okay for her. So I was. Even when I had to fake it. But now, when I really do feel okay, she's not happy with me. Because I'm not perfect anymore.'Grieving doesn't make you imperfect,' Delia said quietly, as Bert came back out to the van, adjusting one of the carts inside. 'It makes you human. We all deal with things differently.”

“So look," he began, leaning over the desk, "I was—""Excuse me?" Bethany said. Her voice was loud, even.Wes turned and looked at her. As he did so, I watched his profile, his arm, that little bit of the heart inhand peeking out from his sleeve."We can help you over here," Bethany said to him. "Did you have a question?""Um, sort of," Wes said, glancing at me, a mild smile on his face. "But—""I can answer it," Bethany said solidly, so confidently. Amanda, beside her, nodded, seconding this."Really, it's fine," he said, then looked at me again. He raised his eyebrows, and I just shrugged. "Okay,so—""She's only a trainee, she won't know the answer," Bethany told him, pushing her chair over closer towhere he was, her voice too loud, bossy even. "It's better if you ask me. Or ask us."Then, and only then, did I see the tiniest flicker of annoyance on Wes's face. "You know," Wes said, "Ithink she'll know it.""She won't. Ask me."Now it wasn't just a flicker. Wes looked at me, narrowing his eyes, and for a second I just stared back.Whatever happens, I thought, happens. For the first time, time at the info desk was flying."Okay," he said slowly, moving down the counter. He leaned on his elbows, closer to Bethany, and shesat up even straighter, readying herself, like someone onJeopardy awaiting the Daily Double. "So here'smy question."Amanda picked up a pen, as if there might be a written portion."Last night," Wes said, his voice serious, "when the supplies were being packed up, what happened tothe big tongs?"The sick part was that Bethany, for a second, looked as if she was actually flipping through her mentalRolodex for the answer. I watched her swallow, then purse her lips. "Well," she said. But that was all.I could feel myself smiling. A real smile.Wes looked at Amanda. "Do you know?"Amanda shook her head slowly."All right," he said, turning back to look at me. "Better ask the trainee, then. Macy?"I could feel Amanda and Bethany looking at me. "They're in the bottom of that cart with the brokenback wheel, under the aprons," I said. "There wasn't room for them with the other serving stuff.”

“That sucks, though," Wes said finally, his voice low. "You're just setting yourself up to fail, because you'llnever get everything perfect.""Says who?"He just looked at me. "The world," he said, gesturing all around us, as if this party, this deck encompassed itall. "The universe. There's just no way. And why would you want everything to be perfect, anyway?""I don't want everything to be perfect," I said. Just me, I thought. Somehow. "I just want—”