“Griffin? You ever heard of knocking?”Griffin sniffed and tucked his chin-length hair behind his ears. “We’re family, dude, I don’t need to knock.”I sighed, not sure if Kellan could argue that point or not—not since Griffin had impregnated my sister. He really was family now. Lord help me.”

“After Kellan begged me for a final kiss, Griffin murmured, “Your wedding day is Thanksgiving. That’s convenient.” He pointed at Kellan. “You probably won’t forget your anniversary.” He looked over at Anna. “We shoulda done that. I already forgot ours.”Anna smirked at Griffin while Kellan’s lip twitched. “Uh, it won’t always be on Thanksgiving, Griff.”He looked horribly confused. “Huh? Yeah, it will.”“Kellan bit his lip. I could tell he was trying really hard not to laugh, since laughing hurt. “Thanksgiving isn’t on the same day every year. It moves around.”Griffin glared at Kellan. “Don’t even try fucking with me, Kell.” He tapped his finger to his head. “I’m on to you.”I heard Matt and Evan snigger with Justin and Denny. My dad stared at the ceiling as he shook his head. I couldn’t contain my giggle; poor Kellan had to take long, slow exhales so he didn’t laugh with everyone else. “Griff, I’m not . . .”

“Grinning ear to ear, Griffin tucked his hair behind his ears. “Not to worry, I’ve got the suit I want all picked out.”My frown even deeper, I pointed at Matt. “Do not let him leave the store if he’s wearing any sort of pastel color.” I paused, then added, “Or anything assless.”

“Alfred, I need ice and that vitamin K goop. To the nursery. Stat.""I loathe you, Master Griffin," came a British accent over the intercom."Thanks, Alfred," Griffin answered and came back to the bed."Is your butler's name really Alfred?""No. It's Jamison, I think. Can't remember. I changed it to Alfred years ago. My first crush on a dude was Batman...”

“How you, uh...How you comin on that novel... you're workin on? - Stewie Griffin, Family Guy”

“Griffin: “Dude! You get to film-fuck Sienna Sexton! High five!”