“Our reconnection was intense and deeply emotional, like much of our relationship had been. He muttered things to me while we made love—how beautiful he thought I was, how much he’d missed me, how much he needed me, how empty he’d been, how much he loved me. I couldn’t even speak to tell him I felt the exact same way. I was too overcome by the emotion in his voice. Then he said something that tore me.“Don’t leave…I don’t want to be alone.” He had actual tears in his eyes as he looked down on me. “I don’t want to be alone, anymore.” ~Kellan”
“He relaxed and looked at my lips and then my eyes and then back to my lips. “How do we do that? This is what we do…back and forth, back and forth. You want me, you want him. You love me, you love him. You like me, you hate me, you want me, you don’t want me, you love me…you leave me. There’s so much that went wrong before…”
“Between pants, I continued spewing how much I hated him. Around my lips, he kept telling me I didn't.”
“What if I don’t choose you, Kellan? What will you do?”He looked away, a tear rolling down his cheek. “I’ll leave, Kiera. I’ll leave, and you and Denny can have your happily ever after.” He looked back at me. “You wouldn’t even need to tell him about me. Eventually, the two of you…” his voice broke and another tear fell on his cheek, “the two of you would get married, and have children, and have a great life.”I fought back a sob. “And you? What happens to you in that scenario?”“I…get by. And I miss you, every day,” he whispered.”
“No, let’s make this interesting. If I win, we have sex backstage tonight. If you win, we have sex backstage tonight.”I wanted to laugh again, but the way he said sex froze my brain for a second. “Um…I don’t think you understand how betting works.”Moving in close to me, he breathed his response into my ear while he rested his hand on my stomach. “Don’t I?”
“Oh . . . wow . . . I don’t know what to say. I want to thank . . .” His voice broke and the tears in my eyes rolled down my cheeks. Bringing the back of his hand to his mouth, Kellan stopped talking. Shaking his head again, he slowly lowered his hand. “I’m sorry.” His voice warbled with barely contained emotion. “My wife just told me she’s pregnant.”
“Do you still love me?” My breath stopped as Iwaited for his answer. I hoped from his expression and his song that hedid, but I needed to hear him acknowledge it.He sighed and looked over my face. Slowly, he nodded. “You wouldnever believe how much.”