“I get mail; therefore I am.”
“Was that the sum total of my exsitence? I didn't get the erudition of 'I think therefore I am.' Instead I got 'I am, therefore I want to fuck Jericho Barrons.”
“I think, therefore I am, therefore I am photographable.”
“I am mad, I think. I am mad therefore I think. I am mad therefore I think I am.”
“I doubt, therefore I think, therefore I am.”
“I want to mail my mailman something. He always brings me mail, yet I never give him any mail. Maybe he will appreciate the thought, or maybe he will feel I am making more work for him.”