“Pirate DreamsNeedles and pins, Needles and pins,Sew me a sail to catch me the wind.Sew me a sail strong as the gale,Carpenter, bring out your hammers and nails.Hammers and nails, hammers and nails,Build me a boat to go chasing the whales.Chasing the whales, sailing the blueFind me a captain and sign me a crew.Captain and crew, captain and crew,Take me, oh take me to anywhere new.”

“Pirate Captain Jim"Walk the plank," says Pirate Jim"But Captain Jim, I cannot swim.""Then you must steer us through the gale.""But Captain Jim, I cannot sail.""Then down with the galley slaves you go.""But Captain Jim, I cannot row.""Then you must be the pirate's clerk.""But Captain Jim, I cannot work.”

“True storyThis morning I jumped on my horseAnd went for a ride,And some wild outlaws chased meAnd shot me in the side.So I crawled into a wildcats caveTo find a place to hideBut some pirates found me sleeping thereAnd soon they had me tiedTo a pole and built a fireUnder me---I almost criedTill a mermaid came and cut me looseAnd begged to be my brideSo I said id come back WednesdayBut I must admit I lied.Then I ran into a jungle swampBut I forgot my guide And I stepped into some quicksandAnd no matter how hard I triedI couldn’t get out, until I metA watersnake named ClydeWho pulled me to some cannibalsWho planned to have me friedBut an eagle came and swooped me upAnd through the air we fliedBut he dropped me in a boiling lakeA thousand miles wideAnd you’ll never guess what I did then---I DIED”

“Tell my I'm clever,Tell me I'm kind,Tell me I'm talented,Tell me I'm cute,Tell me I'm sensitive,Graceful and WiseTell me I'm perfect--But tell me the TRUTH.”

“Just Me, Just MeSweet Marie, she loves just me(She also loves Maurice McGhee).No she don't, she loves just me(She also loves Louise Dupree).No she don't, she loves just me(She also loves the willow tree).No she don't, she loves just me!(Poor, poor fool, why can't you seeShe can love others and still love thee.)”

“FROZEN DREAMI'll take the dream I had last nightAnd put it in my freezer,So someday long and far awayWhen I'm an old grey geezer,I'll take it out and thaw it out,This lovely dream I've frozen,And boil it up and sit me downA dip my old cold toes in.”

“You don't have to shoot me," says the young lion. "I will be your rug and I will lie in front of your fireplace and I won't move a muscle and you can sit on me and toast all the marshmallows you want. I love marshmallows.”