“It’s all right.” He stretched his shoulders out, the flesh between his blades sore, which meant his grizzly hump had grown while he was still human. Rare and not good. “Really. It’s all right. And I can understand if you’re not comfortable staying here tonight.” He looked up at her. “Or if you want some space or…if you…if you…why are you getting naked?”

“You look…” he shook his head looking her up and down, “You look delicious. If I don’t get you out of here, I’m going to devour you like it’s my birthday, and you’re my cake.”

“His eyes sliced to me and he clipped, “Stop that shit.” “What shit?” I asked “The cold, remote Faye. It’s shit,” he answered. “You’re right. It is. It’s a façade to hide the fact my heart is breaking. But, whatever. That isn’t your problem anymore. Now, can I point out, you told me you need space but you’re still fraking here?”

“Oryx,” he says. “I know you’re there.” He repeats the name. It’s not even her real name, which he’d never known anyway; it’s only a word. It’s a mantra. Sometimes he can conjure her up. At first she’s pale and shadowy, but if he can say her name over and over, then maybe she’ll glide into his body and be present with him in his flesh, and his hand on himself will become her hand. But she’s always been evasive, you can never pin her down. Tonight she fails to materialize and he is left alone, whimpering ridiculously, jerking off all by himself in the dark.”

“Tina woke to a thin beam of afternoon sun. She lay still for a moment, revisiting, reliving, trying to get comfortable with the events of the night before. The sound of rustling paper got her up and the smell assaulted her again. Lockie was eating a burger, trying for slow, but failing.He had his back to her as he perched in a corner, secretively stuffing his mouth.‘Hey, Lockie,’ said Tina.Lockie turned, wild-eyed and fearful. He stopped mid-chew and pushed his tongue through his teeth to spit the gooey mess out.‘Gross, kid, just swallow for fuck’s sake.’‘Sorry,’ he mumbled. ‘Sorry for touching, sorry for eating, sorry for being a bad boy.’‘You’re not being a bad boy,’ Tina said. She hated how pathetic the kid sounded. ‘The food is for you, do you understand? It’s all for you.’Lockie stared. He was still and silent, as if waiting for what would happen next. Tina hated the idea that he was afraid of her, that he would have to be afraid of everyone he ever met from now on.‘Say it, kid. Say, “It’s all for me.” Go on, say it.’Lockie stared.‘Say it, Lockie.’‘It’s all . . .’ He faltered.“It’s all for me.” 'Say it, I mean it.’‘It’s all for me.’‘Say it again, Lockie.’‘It’s all for me. All for me, all for me.’‘Okay, kid, you can shut up now. Get back to your breakfast. I might have a cigarette.’‘The food is all for me,’ said Lockie. His voice was determined. He was telling her, but mostly he was telling himself.‘That’s right, kid, it’s all for you.’‘But you can share it with me,’ he said, and he gave Tina a small smile.Someone had taught Lockie all the right rules. Someone who didn’t even know if he was alive right now.‘I bet you’ve got the best mum and dad somewhere.' Lockie nodded and chewed. ‘I bet I do.’ He didn’t talk anymore after that. The memory of his parents had obviously been put somewhere far away so thoughts of them wouldn’t hurt. He wasn’t ready to take them out again.”

“It’s not goodbye, Sam. It’s see you in two days. I promise…” she said stroking his hair away from his dimpled cheek.“I’m counting on it. You will be missed,” he said as he put her hand on his chest near his heart. “You will be missed right here…”