“Fine. You win. I quit. You two deal with this. I’m going home. Packing up all my personal items, and when you, Caleb, end up dead because the coach has your jockstrap or something else I didn’t steal but someone else did, don’t call me. I’m done and I’m going to hide in a bunker until all of this is over with.” – Nick“I hate you, Nick.” – Caleb“Feels mutual, Demon.” – Nick”

“One of you guys is going to have to feed the vampiric lawyer some blood and it can’t be me. (Caleb)Why? You afraid of a little bite?I’m anemic. (Nick)And I’m Catholic. Doesn’t that knock me out of the running? (Nick)”

“But it was for your own good.” – Nick“So’s the spanking I’m about to give you.” – Cherise“I’m too big to spank.” – Nick“Fine, you’re grounded until your grandkids are old.” – Cherise“Kind of hard to do. How am I supposed to have grandkids if I’m grounded?” – Nick“Precisely my point, you demon spawn. You’re never going to get off restriction.” – Cherise”

“For the record, do I know anyone not a demon or a freak?” – Nick“Yes, you do. Not sure if Bubba and Mark go into the latter or not, though. I’m too tired to mentally categorize them. You figure it out, and I’ll go with your Dewey decimal.” – Caleb”

“So how are you feeling this morning?” – Nick“Like I got my ass kicked by a bunch of psycho demons.” – Caleb”

“Nick,” he said. “I think I’m going to need you to bite my arm.”“I think I’m going to need you to run that by me again.”