“Has anyone ever won an argument with you? (Syd)Just Tee, and I was drunk and wounded at the time. (Joe)”

“You are so vicious. (Tee)Hence the nickname. (Syd)You know it’s bad when you make me look like Glinda the Good Witch, right? (Tee)Just call me Elphaba. But don’t drop a house on me, ‘kay? (Syd)”

“You’re such a crybaby. (Tee)Let me almost shoot off one of your testicles and see how you cope. (Joe)You shouldn’t have moved, Joe. It was your fault. (Tee)Yeah, everything’s my fault. (Joe)Good, then we agree. (Tee)”

“Patience is a virtue. (Tee)Excuse me, pot, could you not pick on the kettle? (Joe)”

“Trust me, Joe. You’re not a cowboy. The only cows you ever saw as a kid came under a plastic wrap in the grocery store or in a paper wrapped from McDonald’s. (Tee)”

“Now, why did he have a hard time believing that?...Because it would be the first time in your life that you ever won an argument with Lord Thick and Knotty Pate. (Morgan)”