“I’m not dead yet. It’s all good. (Omari)Good. That whole spontaneous combustion thing can be a real buzzkill. Ruins your clothes, too. (Nero)”

“What if there is no dirt on Merjack?Oh, I can answer this one. (Omari raised his hand like he was in a classroom, then dropped it to his side.) We all die. (Omari)I just love teenage angst. By the way, chip, there are worse things in life than dying. (Nero)Like what? (Omari)Living as a slave. (Alix)”

“What was really unfair about the whole thing was that Oma Kristel hadn't so much exploded as spontaneously combusted. But Gossip is Baron Münchhausen's little sister, and never lets the truth get in the way of a good story.”

“Hey, Dad, you’ve got to taste what we just did. It’s actually good. (Omari)That is good. What did you two do? (Devyn)No idea. We just added spices until it didn’t suck anymore. (Omari)”

“Curiosity is a good thing, like onion soup. But too much onion soup makes your breath smell terrible. And too much curiosity can make your whole body smell terrible, if it causes you to be dead. ”

“Arson is a respected profession among certain subcultures in Jersey, and the good ones don't get caught. The good ones channel lightning and mysterious acts of spontaneous combustion.”