“Or more precisely, is there anything I can do for you, ma’am? (Waiter)‘How about a bag for my head, or a stick to beat Lanie with?’ (Grace)”

“Honey, you need to get laid. (Selena)Why don’t you speak a little louder, Lanie? I don’t think the guys in Canada were able to hear you. (Grace)Oh, I don’t know. They’re probably headed south even as we speak. (Waiter)”

“Inside, I'm doing graceful cartwheels in my head, knowing full well that's the only place I can do graceful cartwheels.”

“I can offer you my life, but it is a short life; I can offer you my heart, though I have no idea how many more beats it shall sustain”

“Okay. Take a peek, but I swear if you try anything funny, I’ll beat your head in with my flashlight.”

“When in doubt, poke the beehive with a stick to see if anything interesting flies out.I clapped my hands. 'I had no idea Pit teams had such pretty cheerleaders. Can you do it again, but with more spirit this time?”