“Wake up, Astrid. Your psychotic criminal is playing with knives. (Sasha)”

“My friend died. (Astrid)Died how? (Zarek)Mmm, he had parvo. (Astrid)Isn’t that a dog’s disease? (Zarek)Yes. It was tragic. (Astrid)Hey! I resent that. (Sasha)Behave or I will give you parvo. (Astrid)”

“And I don’t want his body touching something I wear. He’ll contaminate it. (Sasha)Oh, good grief, Sasha. Grow up. You’re four hundred years old and you’re acting like a whelp. It’s not like he has cooties or anything. (Astrid)Yes he does! (Sasha)”

“Jess:"Sasha? I need some tissue to pack my nose with."Sasha:"Is that hygienically sound?"Jess:"Sasha..."Sasha:"Fine, but if you get toxic shock up your nose, buddy, remember I warned you."Jess pulled a couple out and wedged them into his nostrils. He gave Abigail a sheepish smile. "Sexy, right?"Abby: "Oh yeah, baby. You're so hot right now, if I was a chicken I'd lay hard-boiled eggs.”

“Are you up? Dressing? (Astrid)No. I’m pissing on your rug. What do you think I’m doing? (Zarek)I’m blind. For all I know you really are peeing on my rug, which is a very nice rug incidentally, so I hope you’re kidding. (Astrid)”

“Where are we going? (Astrid)Up Shit Creek sans the paddles. (Zarek)”

“Here. (Zarek)What is it? (Astrid)Arsenic and vomit. (Zarek)Really? And yet you managed to hack that up so quietly. Who knew? Thanks. I’ve never had vomit before. I’m sure it’s extra special. (Astrid)”