“We take our bearings from the wrong landmark, wish that when young we had studied the stars - name the flowers for ourselves and the deserts after others. When the territory is charted, its eventual aspect may be quite other than what was hoped for. One can only say, it will be a whole - a region from which a few features, not necessarily those that seemed prominent at the start, will stand out in clear colours. Not to direct, but to solace us; not to fix our positions, but to show us how we came.”
Shirley Hazzard’s quote reflects on the complexities of life and the importance of perspective in understanding our journey through it. She employs metaphors of navigation and the natural world to illustrate how our formative experiences shape our understanding and perception of existence.
The opening lines highlight a common human tendency to rely on misguided benchmarks for assessing progress or direction in life. By stating, “We take our bearings from the wrong landmark,” Hazzard critiques the way people often depend on external validations or societal standards, rather than developing their own authentic compass. This can lead to a disconnect between aspirations and reality.
When Hazzard suggests we "wish that when young we had studied the stars," she is advocating for introspection and the pursuit of personal knowledge and values. The "stars" symbolize a deeper understanding of oneself and the universe, implying that true guidance comes from within and not from conforming to the expectations of others.
The mention of “naming the flowers for ourselves and the deserts after others” further emphasizes the idea of personal agency in defining one's life experiences. It conjures a vision of an individual deriving meaning from their own journey rather than accepting predefined narratives about success and failure imposed by society.
Hazzard articulates a certain acceptance of life's unpredictability with, “When the territory is charted, its eventual aspect may be quite other than what was hoped for.” This acknowledgment serves as a reminder that despite our best efforts to plan and direct our lives, outcomes often differ from our expectations. The eventual “whole” she describes encourages a holistic view, recognizing that life is multidimensional and rich with both expected and unexpected elements.
Her conclusion—“Not to direct, but to solace us; not to fix our positions, but to show us how we came”—captures the essence of reflective understanding. Instead of providing rigid answers or solutions, the process of reflecting on our experiences offers comfort and clarity. It enables us to appreciate the journey itself rather than pinpointing a singular destination.
Overall, Hazzard’s quote serves as a poignant reminder that while life can be uncertain and unpredictable, our individual stories and the ways we interpret them hold value. By embracing our unique pathways and the lessons they impart, we come to understand not only where we are but also how we arrived at our current state.
“What we have not had to decipher, to elucidate by our own efforts, what was clear before we looked at it, is not ours. From ourselves comes only that which we drag forth from the obscurity which lies within us, that which to others is unknown.”
“All of us are scarred by life; it’s just that some of those scars show more clearly than others. Our scars do matter. They tell us that we have lived, that we haven’t hidden from life. When we see our scars plainly, we can find in them, as I did that day, our own unique beauty”
“Our key to greatness lies not in our ability to project ourselves to others as if we are putting ourselves onto a projector and creating an image of ourselves on a projector screen. Rather, our key to greatness lies in who we are which we can give to other people in a way that when they walk away from us, they are able to say in their hearts that they have taken away something with them quite extraordinary.”
“When we search for "ourselves" in the eyes of others, we have imprisoned our own-selves in believing that our self-worth is nothing unless others validate who we are. Unless we approve of whom we are, what we are, and what we are capable of doing as an individual, only then we will have released "ourselves" from our own imprisonment. We are in charge of our own life's destiny and what we do and become can only be validated by our accomplishments and failures; not by what others may think of us.”
“All things are possible through belief. When we believe others can be so powerful that they can take away from us what is rightfully ours - then it will happen. We surrender our powers, and give them to others who wish to control.”