“If my name was Richard, I'd go by Richard or Rich...not Dick. Hell I'd even settle for being called Chard.”

“The Professor doesn’t have a problem being called Dick? If my name was Richard, I’d go by Richard or Rich . . . not Dick. Hell, I’d even settle for being called Chard.”

“If I had any choice in the matter, I'd stay in my comfy bed and eat warm chocolate chip cookies all day.”

“Did I ever tell you that Alex loves you so much he got your name tattooed all over his body? Hell, he even got your name branded into the back of his neck.""They say 'LB,' Carlos. The initials for Latino Blood.""No, no, no. You've got it all wrong. He wants everyone to think that, but in reality it means Lover of Brittany. LB, get it?”

“You make me believe in love, which I'd give up on. Thank you for proving to me it's not just a fairy tale.”

“I'm in deep shit Alex, 'cause I think I'd like nothin' better than to wake up with her every mornin'.”

“I didn't like seeing you with him" he says. "I don't think I'd like seeing you with any other guy....beside me.”