“When the Mayan Calendar runs out there will be another day. Just like there was with Y2K.”

“Oprah's quitting in 2011. Now we know why the Mayans ended their calendar in 2012”

“She had finally learned the significance of the ending of the Mayan calendar: Elvis and Liberace were clearly coming back from the dead.”

“The days before December 21st, 2012 there were all sorts of TV specials about the end of the world and the Mayan calendar. I always thought it cut off there because some guy said, 'Hey Bob, don't you think we've gone far enough in the future for this thing?”

“Don't be fooled by the calendar. There are only as many days in the year as you make use of. One man gets only a week's value out of a year, while another man gets a full year's value out of a week.”

“On December 21, we will be celebrating in Guatemala the beginning of a new era in accordance with the calendar of the Mayan civilization. The new era, the 13 Baktun, is an invitation to renew physical and spiritual energies in an environment of peace, cooperation and dialogue. All ... are invited to join us to share in this dawn of a new era. The Mayans of yesterday and today, and all Guatemalans, await you with open arms.”