“The phrase 'I just turn on my monkey and it makes me feel good' sounds very dirty, but I can't explain why. It's great to try to use expressions like that on the comics page. People want to complain but they can't, because they can't figure out quite what they should be complaining about.”

“I just used a very simple way to explain what are deep ideas, and why can't that be literature?”

“Something about you now I can't quite figure out Everything she does is beautiful Everything she does is rightCause it's you and me and all of the people With nothing to do, nothing to lose And it's you and me and all of the people And I don't know why I can't keep my eyes off of you.”

“Vote? What's so fun about voting? You should never vote, everyone knows that. If you vote and your guy wins you can't later complain because you helped put him there. That's why I never vote, so I can later complain.”

“If you can quit, quit. If you can't quit, stop complaining - this is what you chose.”

“I got singled out. I don't know why. Why do people always target me? Is it because I'm short and they figure I can't fight back? They're right, I can't, but it's not because I'm vertically challenged.”