“Anna?" Someone knocks on my door, and it startles me out of my seat.No.Not someone. St. Clair.I'm wearing an old Mayfield Dairy T-shirt, complete with yellow-and-brown cow logo,and hot pink flannel pajama bottoms covered in giant strawberries. I am not even wearing a bra."Anna,I know you're in there. I can see your light.""Hold on a sec!" I blurt. "I'll be right there." I grab my black hoodie and zip it up over the cow's face before wrenching open the door. "Hisorryaboutthat. Come in."I open the door wide but he stands there for a moment, just staring at me. I can't read the expression on his face. Then he breaks into a mischievous smile and brushes past me."Nice strawberries.""Shut up.""No,I mean it. Cute."And even though he doesn't mean it like I-want-to-leave-my-girlfriend-and-start-dating-you cute,something flickers inside of me. The "force of strength and destruction" Tita de la Garza knew so well.St. Clair stands in the center of my room.He scratches his head, and his T-shirt lifts up on one side, exposing a slice of bare stomach.Foomp! My inner fire ignites."It's really...er...clean," he says.Fizz. Flames extinguished.”

“And even though he doesn't mean it like I-want-to-leave-my-girlfriend-and-start-dating-you cute, something flickers inside of me. The "force of strength and destruction" Tita de la Garza knew so well.”

“I almost jumped when the door opened. Alex came back inside, wearing black sweatpants; I swallowed as I saw his chest bare. "Forgot my T-shirt," he said sheepishly. His bag was on the floor near the bed, and I watched the lantern light play on his skin as he crossed to it. Squatting by the bag, he pulled out a T-shirt; I sat frozen, taking in the movement of his back and shoulders.I stood up, my heart hammering. "Wait. Can I just...?" I trailed off as he turned to look at me."What?" he said, rising to his feet.An embarrassed laugh escaped me. I shook my head. "Just--before you put that on, can I...?" In slow motion, I went over to him. I reached out toward his chest and then stopped, my fingers hesitating an inch from his skin. "Is--this all right?"Alex stood very still, a soft smile on his face. "Anything you want is all right.”

“Do I need to check up on you guys later? You know the rules.No sleeping in opposite-sex rooms."My face flames,and St. Clair's cheeks grow blotchy. It's true.It's a rule. One that my brain-my rule-loving, rule-abiding brain-conveniently blocked last night. It's also one notoriously ignored by the staff."No,Nate," we say.He shakes his shaved head and goes back in his apartment. But the door opens quickly again,and a handful of something is thrown at us before it's slammed back shut.Condoms.Oh my God, how humiliating.St. Clair's entire face is now bright red as he picks the tiny silver squares off the floor and stuffs them into his coat pockets. We don't speak,don't even look at each other,as we climb the stairs to my floor. My pulse quickens with each step.Will he follow me to my room,or has Nate ruined any chance of that?We reach the landing,and St. Clair scratches his head. "Er...""So...""I'm going to get dressed for bed. Is that all right?" His voice is serious,and he watches my reaction carefully."Yeah.Me too.I'm going to...get ready for bed,too.""See you in a minute?"I swell with relief. "Up there or down here?""Trust me,you don't want to sleep in my bed." He laughs,and I have to turn my face away,because I do,holy crap do I ever. But I know what he means.It's true my bed is cleaner. I hurry to my room and throw on the strawberry pajamas and an Atlanta Film Festival shirt. It's not like I plan on seducing him.Like I'd even know how. St. Clair knocks a few minutes later, and he's wearing his white bottoms with the blue stripes again and a black T-shirt with a logo I recognize as the French band he was listening to earlier. I'm having trouble breathing."Room service," he says.My mind goes...blank. "Ha ha," I say weakly.He smiles and turns off the light. We climb into bed,and it's absolutely positively completely awkward. As usual. I roll over to my edge of the bed. Both of us are stiff and straight, careful not to touch the other person. I must be a masochist to keep putting myself in these situations. I need help. I need to see a shrink or be locked in a padded cell or straitjacketed or something.After what feels like an eternity,St. Clair exhales loudly and shifts. His leg bumps into mine, and I flinch. "Sorry," he says."It's okay.""...""...""Anna?""Yeah?""Thanks for letting me sleep here again. Last night..."The pressure inside my chest is torturous. What? What what what?"I haven't slept that well in ages."The room is silent.After a moment, I roll back over. I slowly, slowly stretch out my leg until my foot brushes his ankle. His intake of breath is sharp. And then I smile,because I know he can't see my expression through the darkness.”

“If you fall and break something, I’m going to be irritated.”Daemon grabbed my arm as I started to slip.“Sorry, not all of us can be as awesome---“ I squealed as he slid an arm around my back and lifted be into his arms. Daemon zipped us up the driveway, wind and snow blowing at my face. He put me down, and I stumbled to the side, dizzy. “Could you give me a warning next time?”He grinned as he knocked on the door. “And miss that look on your face? Never.”Sometimes I seriously wanted to just punch him in the face, but it made me warm in all the right place to see this side of him again, too.“You’re insufferable.”“You like my kind of suffering.”

“Anna? Anna,are you there? I've been waiting in the lobby for fifteen minutes." A scrambling noise,and St. Clair curses from the floorboards. "And I see your light's off.Brilliant. Could've mentioned you'd decided to go on without me."I explode out of bed. I overslept! I can't believe I overslept! How could this happen?St. Clair's boots clomp away,and his suitcase drags heavily behind him. I throw open my door. Even though they're dimmed this time of night,the crystal sconces in the hall make me blink and shade my eyes.St. Clair twists into focus.He's stunned. "Anna?""Help," I gasp. "Help me."He drops his suitcase and runs to me. "Are you all right? What happened?"I pull him in and flick on my light. The room is illuminated in its disheveled entirety. My luggage with its zippers open and clothes piled on top like acrobats. Toiletries scattered around my sink. Bedsheets twined into ropes. And me. Belatedly, I remember that not only is my hair crazy and my face smeared with zit cream,but I'm also wearing matching flannel Batman pajamas."No way." He's gleeful. "You slept in? I woke you up?"I fall to the floor and frantically squish clothes into my suitcase."You haven't packed yet?""I was gonna finish this morning! WOULD YOU FREAKING HELP ALREADY?" I tug on a zipper.It catches a yellow Bat symbol, and I scream in frustration.We're going to miss our flight. We're going to iss it,and it's my fault. And who knows when the next plane will leave, and we'll be stuck here all day, and I'll never make it in time for Bridge and Toph's show. And St. Clair's mom will cry when she has to go to the hospital without him for her first round of internal radiation, because he'll be stuck iin an airport on the other side of the world,and its ALL. MY FAULT."Okay,okay." He takes the zipper and wiggles it from my pajama bottoms. I make a strange sound between a moan and a squeal. The suitcase finally lets go, and St. Clair rests his arms on my shoulders to steady them. "Get dressed. Wipe your face off.I'll takecare of the rest."Yes,one thing at a time.I can do this. I can do this.ARRRGH!He packs my clothes. Don't think about him touching your underwear. Do NOT think about him touching your underwear. I grab my travel outfit-thankfully laid out the night before-and freeze. "Um."St. Clair looks up and sees me holding my jeans. He sputters. "I'll, I'll step out-""Turn around.Just turn around, there's not time!"He quickly turns,and his shoulders hunch low over my suitcase to prove by posture how hard he is Not Looking.”