“What just happened?""Your father invited the former love of your life in for pie.""Yeah, that's what I thought.”

“Your father and I will deal with him.”“What are you going to do?” I say.“We will talk to him.” I snort.“Yeah, that's going to work.”

“They're monsters.""That's what Edward thought.""Oh, yeah? He a friend of yours?""No, Miss Librarian. Just a main character in a wildly popular vampire series.”

“What happened the day I met your father,' she said, 'is that I learned you ave to choose. For better or for worse. You have to choose what your life is going to look like.”

“...And nostalgia is a cancer. Nostalgia will fill your heart up with tumors. Yeah, yeah, yeah, that's what you are. You're just an old fart dying of terminal nostalgia.”

“You died in your sleep? Drunk driver? Cancer,huh? World war? Well...yeah those deaths are great and all,but wait till I tell you what happened to me. Yeah...that's right...I said kraken.”