“The summer movies are coming out. My advice: just stay home and burn a good book.”

“Summer movie idea: take all the sequels that are out right now, and make movies about their backstories.”

“it's back to school time. or as home-schoolers call it, stay-where-you-are time.”

“Now, for my younger viewers out there, a book is something we used to have before the internet. It’s sort of a blog for people with attention spans.”

“(on fox news).... it's like watching a Disney movie about the news.”

“I may be just an empty flesh terminal reliant on technology for all my ideas, memories and relationships, but I am confident that all of that everything that makes me a unique human being is still out there somewhere, safe in a theoretical storage space owned by giant, multinational corporations.”

“Think books aren't scary? Well, think about this: You can't spell "Book" without "Boo!”