“But they wrote like little old men and little old ladies, all purseymouthed and ooo, don't slip on that icy patch, Mildred.”

“So she made no secret about being gay?""Why should she?" the little old lady asked. "Nobody would care but a bunch of stuffy old men.”

“Did I just get psychically pimp-slapped by a little old lady?”

“The Little Boy and the Old ManSaid the little boy, "Sometimes I drop my spoon."Said the old man, "I do that too."The little boy whispered, "I wet my pants."I do that too," laughed the little old man.Said the little boy, "I often cry."The old man nodded, "So do I."But worst of all," said the boy, "it seemsGrown-ups don't pay attention to me."And he felt the warmth of a wrinkled old hand.I know what you mean," said the little old man.”

“Your confidence in me is heartwarming.Makes me want to return all the money I stole from the little old ladies and kick the heroin.”

“Little girls are like old cats. If they don't like you nothing on Earth will make them pretend to.”