“God turned out to be a bunch of bad little kids playing interstellar Xbox. Isn't that funny?”

“Seven little crazy kids chopping up sticks;One burnt her daddy up and then there were six.Six little crazy kids playing with a hive;One tattooed himself to death and then there were five.Five little crazy kids on a cellar door;One went all schizo and then there were four.Four little crazy kids going out to sea;One wouldn't say a word and then there were three.Three little crazy kids walking to the zoo;One jerked himself too much and then there were two.Two little crazy kids sitting in the sun;One a took a bunch of pills and then there was one.One little crazy kid left all alone;He went and slit his wrists, and then there were none.”

“God writes a lot of comedy... the trouble is, he's stuck with so many bad actors who don't know how to play funny.”

“The Side Effects of Dying in Your Pants isn't really funny… Alright, it's a little funny.”

“How can you respect the world when you see it's being run by a bunch of kids turned old?”

“You see, life only turns out good or bad for only a little bit. And then it turns out some other way.”