“Pam's father had been diagnosed with rectal cancer. It didn't surprise me. Put a bunch of white assholes together and you're going to find that going around.”
“I tensed up like someone had just given me a surprise rectal exam.”
“The night before, Paramedic (in Training) Lindsey Lee Wells had diagnosed him with moderate contusions and "sprained balls" after an exhaustive search of medical Web sites. She diagnosed TOC as suffering from 'I'm-an-asshole-and-Lindsey's-never-going-to-speak-to-me-again-itis'.”
“Almost lost you," he thought, surprised to find himself blinking back tears. "Been through too much, me and you. We're going to finish this thing together.”
“Let me just say it out loud so we can laugh together: You're going to find Johnny Depp, take him back to Vahalal, and put him in a zoo?”
“Pam: "Claude, the mouthwateringly beautiful asshole?”