“They say bachelors have all the fun. Not so. You just get old and full of sand, nasty.”

“Sometimes you just have to jump in a mud puddle because it's there. Never get so old that you forget about having fun.”

“I don't like people. I don't like any kind of people. When you get them together in a big lump they all get nasty and dirty and full of trouble. So I don't like people including you. That's what a misanthropist is.”

“There's no pleasure in getting to be an old coot unless you have some fun along the way.”

“I'm just saying it's not all sand castles and ninjas.”

“Well, then, go you into hell?BEATRICENo, but to the gate; and there will the devil meet me, like an old cuckold, with horns on his head, and say 'Get you to heaven, Beatrice, get you to heaven; here's no place for you maids:' so deliver I up my apes, and away to Saint Peter for the heavens; he shows me where the bachelors sit, and there live we as merry as the day is long.”