“Crime is one of the many methods justice may select.”

“One golfer a year is hit by lightning. This may be the only evidence we have of god’s existence.”

“Seemed she should learn to smile when she was unhappy, to stop laughing, to speak up, to never speak to strangers, to share guilt for the acts of strangers, that strangers made the laws of the land, that the laws of the land valued things over life, that life ended if a stranger decided it, to be where she could be found, to feel one thing and do another. How could she hang so many contradictions in one skull”

“Originality irritates so obscurely that people may have to evolve to scratch it.”

“How many times does a man have to shave before his chin gets the message?”

“A sniper is like a genius - it’s not enough to be one, you have to be one at something.”

“One thing you’ll say for skeletons, they’ll always give you a smile.”