“Honesty is the voice that is acceptable in every matter.”

“Biting enemies seems to be acceptable in a surprisingly narrow range of circumstances, or so a ninja shouted at me once”

“No matter how good the idea, there’s always an advocate extreme enough to deter people.”

“a story is ready when it falls from your face”

“Ideas are self-replenishing, like snot”

“One golfer a year is hit by lightning. This may be the only evidence we have of god’s existence.”

“The most amusing thing about a pantomime horse is the necessity of having to shoot it twice.”