“Will I tell them? No, as a Doctor you wouldn't tell a patient if they were dying of cancer.”

“Instead of telling our young people to plan ahead, we should tell them to plan to be surprised.” — Dan Burns”

“I`m already seeing my daughter`s cynical sense of humor and she`s 6! I bought these shoes, and I`m thinking I`m a cool dad, I`m going to show her my new half-boot shoes. So I said, "What do you think of these?" And she`s like, "Mmm no, not liking them." (2007)”

“You may look around, and see two groups here. White collar, blue collar. But I don’t see it that way. You know why not? Because I am collar-blind.”

“Everyone said to Vincent van Gogh, "You can't be a great painter, you only have one ear." And you know what he said? "I can't hear you.”

“They say that when you find true love, you know within the first 24 hours. Well with Carol I knew within the first 24 minutes... of the second day that I met her.”

“It was kind of like they were just giving us a toy to play with, to do whatever we wanted with.”