“Hucky was so dazzled by the view of the colored lights from Forty-seventh Street, he could only manage to ask me two questions: (1) "doesn't it look like Christmas?" and (2) "Why is that man peeing on the street?" So I told him (1) "Yes," and (2) "Because that's the way they do it in New York. But you have to have a license first." I had to lie through my teeth about the last part because I'd already jumped ahead to what he was planning when we got out of the cab.”

“REAL LIFE vs THE MOVIESBreaking Up in the Movies:Boy #1: This isn’t working out, is it?Boy #2: Sort of not, huh?Boy #1: You can’t say we didn’t try.Boy #2: We sure did. Besides, we’re still best friends.Boy #1: Forever.Boy #2: This is terrific pasta.Breaking Up for Real:Boy #1: Are you asleep?Boy #2: Does it sound like it?Boy #1: I’m sorry about the tuna fish.Boy #2: It isn’t the tuna fish! It’s the last six months!Boy #1: You’re an asshole.Boy #2: Let go of my cock.”

“Even though I didn't notice it while it was happening, I got reminded in ninth grade of a few things I guess I should have known all along. 1. A first kiss after five months means more than a first kiss after five minutes. 2. Always remember what it was like to be six. 3. Never, ever stop believing in magic, no matter how old you get. Because if you keep looking long enough and don't give up, sooner or later you're going to find Mary Poppins. And if you're reall lucky, maybe even a purple balloon.”

“This week my son thinks he's the Supremes.All of them. So we can scratch "straight"off the list. At least I hope we can. As a gay kid he'll be a natural leader. Put him in a macho bullshit environment and he's going to have a hard time. I don't want that to happen. (Let's also not forget Wei's immortal words to him nine minutes after he was born, when she first stared into those big brown eyes: "Oh, honey. Promose me you'll grow up to like boys. Because I don't want any other woman in your life except me.")”

“Ale Perez What happened to your right hand? TCKeller hucky made me finger-spell supercalifragilisticexpialidocious untill he got it right. it took an hour and a half. i still can't hold a fork. what's the favour.”

“It would have served me right if I'd had a cerebral aneurysm on the spot. Instead, I forgot all about my foot--until we shoved the flat onto the stage. I think we broke my ankle. This is bullshit. I have finals to worry about.”

“Let's also not forget Wei's immortal words to him nine minutes after he was born, when she first stared into those big brown eyes: 'Oh, honey. Promise me you'll grow up to like boys. Because I don't want any other woman in your life except me.”