“What do little birdies see when they get knocked unconscious?”

“What do you do when you see an endangered animal that eats only endangered plants?”

“I got a new shadow. I had to get rid of the other one – it wasn’t doing what I was doing.”

“When I was crossing the border into Canada, they asked if I had any firearms with me. I said, "Well, what do you need?”

“How do you get off a non-stop flight?”

“What happens if you get scared half to death twice?”

“So I got off the plane and I forget to take off my seat-belt and I’m dragging the plane through the terminal... The wings are knocking people over...”