“When I was fourteen, I had a massive poster on my wall of a giant pop-art mouth advertising a Swiss exhibition of abstract art. My friends and family mocked my pretention, but I loved that poster and the hope it offered of an exciting world of thought beyond the boundaries of stifling Solihull. But one day the poster fell off the wall and the dog pissed all over it, ruining it for ever, while my mother laughed. That poster is what the Alternative Comedy dream meant to me - the possibility of a better world. And now it is covered in dog's piss.”

“Over to my left is the big grey wall in front of the church.Are we the Thoughts of God? a poster asks.No, I realise. It's the reverse. ”

“When the horse was little, Massie had covered the walls with posters of young fillies that she thought Brownie would find sexy.”

“Everything in my room was old and faded, but I loved that about it. It felt like there might be secrets in the walls, in the four-poster bed, especially in that music box.”

“I am a poster child with no poster”

“I like your room," I said truthfully."Yeah? I like it too. Mom tried to guy it all up when I left for school but...""Guy it all up?" I asked, cocking a questioning brow at him."Yeah. When I came back my first break from college, she had decorated everything in swimming. Water waves bedspread. Michael Phelps posters, my old trophies and medals on my shelf. She even had a poster over my bed that said 'Swimmers Do It Right'." I laughed and then covered it with my hand. "Yeah, so I fixed it. I like things plain, not loud.”