“Now, this is where I draw the line! It's bad enough everybody in town's going to be thinkin' I'm sleeping with a depressed, lice-ridden, hemorrhoidal foreigner who likes to be tied up and might be pregnant, although-since she's just about cornered the market on condoms-I don't know how that could have happened. But I will not-you listen to me, Emma!-I absolutely will not have anybody thinkin' a woman of mine needs a vaginal moisturizer, do you hear me?”

“So...like, you're lyin' on the battlefield with an arrow for a decoration, and everybody homes in on it like a beacon and they start pryin' it out WHILE you're conscious, and you're thinkin' "Ahh! Don't trouble yourselves, just leave it in there for goodness' sake! I got it first, it's mine! Don't touch it! I can use it to hang stuff on and--aahh!" And then when you finally faint from all the pain, they shake you and shout your name and try to wake you up, and you're thinkin' "Heeeeeeell no, I ain't comin' back to that! Why d'you think I fainted in the first place?!" Then they get all frantic-like and such and start hollerin' "Don't die on me, man!" and you're thinkin' "The only one gonna die here is you if you don't quit shaking me!”

“I have a feeling that you're riding for some kind of a terrible, terrible fall. But I don't honestly know what kind. . . Are you listening to me?"Yes."You could tell he was trying to concentrate and all.It may be the kind where, at the age of thirty, you sit in some bar hating everybody who comes in looking as if he might have played football in college. Then again, you may pick up just enough education to hate people who say, 'It's a secret between he and I.' Or you may end up in some business office, throwing paper clips at the nearest stenographer. I just don't know. But do you know what I'm driving at, at all?”

“A year ago, I was too busy thinkin' about how lucky I was that someone as beautiful and talented as you let me into her bed to be bossy. Now I know you love me, I can be as bossy as I want.”

“My therapist told me I need to learn to love myself. It sounds easy enough, but really, how do you just wake up one day and learn that? It feels like something you should just do involuntarily, like swallowing or blinking, but now I have to work on it. It feels so forced. I mean, I know I went to a good school, and people tell me I'm smart and creative, but I don't KNOW that. I don't know how to make myself feel that.”

“You said everything I needed to hear. I'm hooked now. You have me. What are you going to do with me?”