“I hate alliterative names. They suck.”

“When I was twenty-five, I went on exactly four dates with a much older guy whom I’ll call Peter Parker. I’m calling him Peter Parker because the actual guy’s name was also alliterative, and because, well, it’s my book and I’ll name a guy I dated after Spider-Man’s alter ego if I want to.”

“Everything with me is either worship and passion or pity and understanding. I hate rarely, though when I hate, I hate murderously. For example now, I hate the bank and everything connected with it. I also hate Dutch paintings, penis-sucking, parties, and cold rainy weather. But I am much more preoccupied with loving.”

“The gentry protect their names like hymens,They suck their names like thumbs,But they sign their names and something happens.While Zimmer, I can write, Zimmer,All day, and nothing happens.”

“I suck at all this supernatural stuff. But I fry a mean chicken.Oh, good. I hate it when the nice ones get fried.”

“i was in love with the sound of the slamming door, it sounded the way i felt, like damn you to hell! and i hate what you're doing to me! and Life sucks. ”