“Too bad Einstein’s dead. I’m sure he would have appreciated my latest discoverywithin the space-time continuum.The closer you are to experiencing a monumental event, the longer timestretches out. It makes you feel alone”

“When someone rips your heart out, there's nothing you can do to change how you feel about them. You just have to keep feeling that way until it goes away. Until it never does.”

“It's just like John Mayer says in "Slow Dancing in a Burning Room". When it's this bad, you have to get out or you'll get burned.”

“I’ve already lived through the worst time of my life. So I know that whatever happens to me from now on, nothing will ever be as bad as it was back then. That makes me happy.”

“But maybe those things are like background noise if you’re from here. Maybe you have to experience this as a whole new place to appreciate it like I do.”

“Too bad guys aren’t like Mr. Potato Head Where you can pick and choose which parts you want. Then we might come up with a guy who meets your standards.”

“Derek’s like, “So . . . what do you want to do first?”“I don’t know.”“Feel like ice cream?”“It’s, like, three degrees out.”“That’s why getting ice cream would be badass.”