“I know the M-word makes you nervous, but yeah. I'm talking about the big, permanent friendship. A little different from what Joe and Charles had, though. See, I want to be the kind of best friends who make love every night, who share all their darkest secrets and favorite jokes, and maybe even someday make babies together. I know that kind of friendship requires hard work, but you know, I'm pretty good at hard work.~ Tom Paoletti, "The Unsung Hero”

“We are not, not now, not ever, talking about sex,” A.J. said flatly.I had to laugh. “We’re both grown men,” I pointed out. “I don’t see what the big deal—”“Do it,” he said, “and I will walk over to the church, wake up the priest, and demand that he perform an exorcism. On the spot.”“Well, now, that won’t work,” I scoffed. “I’m not a demon. Not even close.”“Yeah, well, I’m willing to try it,” he said. “So go on. Make my day.”

“I'll be careful."He looked at her."I promise.""Call me if you need me.""Cosmo."He turned to look at her."It does go both ways. I don't want to get a call from Tom Paoletti and Decker every Memorial Day.”

“Showtime,’ Jamie said, heavy on the sh. ‘You gonna tell her your real name or make something up? I always liked Ferd McGurgle. It’s not one of those names you forget, where you have to stop and think, Now, who did I say I was again, Tom Smith or Bill Jones . . .?’‘Actually,’ A.J. said, trying his best to ignore Jamie’s help, ‘you do know my name.’ He cleared his throat as she looked puzzled, that little ever-present almost-smile ready to expand across her face. He exhaled and just said it. ‘It’s Gallagher.’‘Nicely done.’ Jamie applauded. ‘Good segue, good choice—honesty. Much better than Ferd. I’m proud of you, kid.’But Allison was still puzzled, still about to smile, until she realized what he’d said. Her mouth dropped open, but she closed it fast. ‘Gallagher?’ she repeated and the smile was definitely gone. ‘As in Gallagher?’‘As in Austin James Gallagher,’ A.J. told her with a nod. ‘I’m A.J. for short. I was named after my great-grandfather.’ He lifted her file. ‘Jamie. He dropped the Austin after he came west. Too many people thought he was from Texas, which kind of pissed him off.’ He tried to make a joke. ‘He’d met a few Texans he didn’t particularly like, so . . .’Silence.Yeah.”

“You have no idea how much I appreciate your friendship,” Jules said. Sam held out several bills. “Yeah, actually I do,” he said. “It’s probably as much as I appreciate yours.”

“How can you sit here and know that day... three I'm not going to be driving you crazy because I laugh like a horse or...or... dress up your penis in Barbie clothes?”

“If he's at this party, I want you to stay far away from him.""Shouldn't that rule apply to you, and Jules, too? Unless your penises make you magically bulletproof.”