“You’re not a bad person,” she told him, knowing where his thoughts had taken him. “I’m not saying you’re perfect. You’re cocky and a know-it-all and you’re addicted to working. But you’ve got a nice big dick and great bedroom skills, so I’m willing to overlook all that.”

“I’m sure you think you’re a very nice guy, but from where I’m sitting at the moment all I see is an asshole. Yes, you’re a very good-looking asshole, with a great body and handsome face and nice tan and all that, but do you know what the best thing about assholes is? When they keep quiet and go away.”

“You know, you’re a little complicated after all.” “Oh no,” she assured him hastily. “No, I’m not really - I’m just a - I’m just a whole lot of different simple people.”

“I’m cold,' Snowden said softly, 'I’m cold.''You’re going to be all right, kid,' Yossarian reassured him with a grin. 'You’re going to be all right.''I’m cold,' Snowden said again in a frail, childlike voice. 'I’m cold.''There, there,' Yossarian said, because he did not know what else to say. 'There, there.''I’m cold,' Snowden whimpered. 'I’m cold.''There, there. There, there.”

“Life isn’t so bad. I’m not fat (unless you’re Gandhi), I’m not short (unless you’re Goliath), and I’m not ugly (unless you’re James Dean).”

“I’m so pleased you’re such a quick judge of character. You’ve got him tagged.”“Yep, toe-tagged, in the freezer, then buried six feet under.”