“I love you, Gideon.”“God.” He looked at me with something that resembled disgust. Whether it was directed at me or himself, I didn’t know. “How can you say that?”“Because it’s the truth.”“You just see this”—he gestured at himself with a wave of his hand. “You’re not seeing the fucked-up, broken mess inside.”I inhaled sharply. “You can say that to me? When you know I’m fucked up and broken, too?”

“Gideon cupped my face in his hands and kissed me, our flavors mingling. “Thank you.”“What are you thanking me for? You did all the work.”“There’s no work involved in fucking you, angel.” His slow smile was pure satiated male. “I’m grateful for the privilege.”I sank back onto my heels. “You’re killing me. You can’t be that gorgeous and sexy and say stuff like that. It’s overload. It fries my brain. Sends me into a meltdown.”His smile widened and he kissed me again. “I know the feeling.”

“I don’t think you do. This” –he gestured impatiently at himself– “is just a fucking shell. You’re what drives me, Eva. Can you understand that? You’re my heart and soul. If something ever happened to you it would kill me, too. Keeping you safe is goddamned self-preservation! Tolerate it for me, if you won’t do it for yourself.”I surged into him, knocking him off-balance and onto his back. I kissed him hard, my heart pounding and blood roaring in my ears.“I hate to freak you out,” I murmured between desperate kisses, “but you’ve got it real bad for me.”

“It's not the right word, Eva," he pressed on stubbornly, his lips at my ear. "That's why I haven't said it. It's not the right word for you and what I feel for you.""Shut up. If you care about me at all, you'll just shut up and go away.""I've been loved before--by Corinne, by other women...But what the hell do they know about me? What the hell are they in love with when they don't know how fucked up I am? If that's love, it's nothing compared to what I feel for you.”

“Are you sleeping with anyone?” The question was asked so casually it took a second to process what he’d said. I inhaled sharply. “Why is that any business of yours?” He looked at me and I saw what I’d seen the first time we’d met—tremendous power and steely control. Both of which had me taking an involuntary step back. Again. At least I didn’t fall this time; I was making progress. “Because I want to fuck you, Eva. I need to know what’s standing in my way, if anything.”

“That you can know what i have in me and still want me as much as i want you. i go to sleep every night afraid i'll wake up and you'll be gone.or that i scared you away ... that i dreamed you-" "no. Gideon." jesus he broke my heart every day. shattered me.”

“That’s what scares me, Gideon. You don’t know what you’re worth.” “Actually, I do. Twelve bill—” “Shut up.”