“His father was an ass and he is an ass. I imagine sooner than I should like I shall be playing uncle to a litter of asses.”

“Gee, thanks Dad. I promise to be a good boy and play nice with the other kids.(Kyrian)Smart ass.(Julian)Better than a dumb ass.(Kyrian)”

“Just don’t stare at my ass, Landemere,” he added.“I wasn’t staring at your ass,” Arranulf, who had been staring at his ass, said.”

“O, that he were here to write me down an ass! But, masters, remember, that I am an ass; though it be not written down, yet forget not that I am an ass.”

“The gentle reader will never, never know what a consummate ass he can become until he goes abroad. I speak now, of course, in the supposition that the gentle reader has not been abroad, and therefore is not already a consummate ass. If the case be otherwise, I beg his pardon and extend to him the cordial hand of fellowship and call him brother. I shall always delight to meet an ass after my own heart when I have finished my travels.”

“All other beer is ass, and I will not put in the the work to acquire the taste for things that taste like ass.”