“Jenny can still suck a golf ball through a garden hose and she guns my cock like a champ since she misplaced her false teeth!”

“Could you stand still please?' Sylvia says in an irritated voice. If she had sweaty balls and an almost-boner she wouldn't be so judgmental. Am I right, or am I right?”

“Just giving Jenny a last minute pep talk before the race," Drew informs him."There's no need for that, Claire is going to kick everyone's ass." Carter says.Drew laughs and shakes his head. "Oh that's hilarious, limp dick! I know for a fact that Jenny will be the victor.""The Victor? Who's Victor? Is that like some vibrator champion or something? Is the race named after this Victor guy?"Claire pats my shoulder and just smiles at me. I guess she already knows about Victor. I'm always the last to know everything.”

“I'm not going to hold my breast for another invitiation" - Jenny”

“Wow, she doesn't have any bones. Like, at all. Where the f*ck are her bones? Am I still drunk? Did I sleep with a blow-up doll? Again? I pealed my eyes open one at a time so the rays of sun shining in the room wouldn't make me go blind. Once my eyes adjusted to the light, I looked down and groaned. Nope, not drunk, just hugging a pillow.”

“I should ask her to marry me now. If I do it while she's coming, she probably won't be able to say no. It would be physically impossible. Like performing a sex exorist. THE POWER OF THE ORGASM COMPELS YOU!”

“She smells like chocolate and I don’t like to be spanked.”