“Never miss a good chance to shut up.”

“After eating an entire bull, a mountain lion felt so good that he started roaring. He kept it up until a hunter came along and shot him. The moral: when you're full of bull, keep your mouth shut.”

“Good judgment comes from experience, and a lotta that comes from bad judgment.”

“Remain independent of any source of income that will deprive you of your personal liberties.”

“There is no other human activity that depends so much on chance as love.”

“No matter how much he loves you, sometimes he'd just rather have an inch of rain than anything else in the world.”

“Never miss...A good chance to shut up!”