“I'm getting pretty good at masturbating”

The Onion

The Onion - “I'm getting pretty good at masturbating” 1

Similar quotes

“I'm a good citizen. I'm a good father. I recycle and I masturbate.”

Louis C.K.
Read more

“I'm pretty, but I'm not beautiful. I sin, but I'm not the devil. I'm good, but I'm not an angel.”

Mariyn Monroe
Read more

“Life's pretty good, and why wouldnt it be? I'm a pirate, after all.”

Johnny Depp
Read more

“Procrastination is like masturbation, in the beginning it feels good, but in the end, you're just f***ing yourself!”

michael mccarthy
Read more

“Absolutely not. I'm an expert in procrastination, but the last thing I want you to think is that I'm incompetent, too. Because I'm actually pretty good at what I do.”

Nicholas Sparks
Read more