“Ideally, the umpire should combine the integrity of a Supreme Court judge, the physical agility of an acrobat, the endurance of Job and the imperturbability of Buddha.”

“Goats are extremely cute and fairly intelligent (for livestock) and, importantly, delicious.”

“Said Buddha to the hot dog vendor, "make me one with everything.”

“People who say it cannot be done should not interrupt those who are doing it.”

“When bad things happen, I know you want to believe they are a joke, But sometimes life is scary and dark. That is why we must find the light.”

“It isn't pollution that's harming the environment. It's The impurities in our air and water that are doing it”

“What me worry?”