“When all else fails...try smoking a good cigar and have a stiff drink. If that doesn't work...have another.”

“I have three rules to live by: Get your work done. If that doesn't work, shut up and drink your gin, and when all else fails, run like hell.”

“Have a drink, and try to relax. All right, have another drink. There are times when getting drunk's not a bad idea.”

“We had forgotten the most important lesson of being women: We are one another, and when all else fails, we have one another.”

“It's beautiful to have a smoking jacket, a good cigar and a wife who plays the piano. So relaxing. So lenitive. Between the acts you go out for a smoke and a breath of fresh air.”

“Open the old cigar-box .....let me consider anew..... Old friends, and who is Maggie that I should abandon you? A million surplus Maggies are willing 'o bear the yoke; And a woman is only a woman, but a good cigar is a Smoke. Light me another Cuba..... I hold to my first-sworn vows, If Maggie will have no rival, I'll have no Maggie for spouse!”