“What would these young kids do if they didn't have a computer? They wouldn't find their way around the own back pocketsfrom Amaury's Hellion (Scanguards Vampires, #2)”

“I wouldn't be able to do anything with my vampire horde except make it run around in a herd, but it would be a very impressive herd.”

“If you didn't have someone to hate, you wouldn't know what to do with yourself, would you?”

“If you had watched any of those three wonderful films, you would have caught Vampire Gym Teacher # 2: Back to Cruel, where the vampire hunter ties a vampire chick to the shower and tortures her by turning on the water. They can‟t stand water, even if it‟s not holy water.”

“I've been asked by lots of people, "What happens if you do kill yourself?" They want to know about what it would be like for other people around you, like the person who would find your body, the other kids at school, whoever would have to clean up the blood, what your family holidays would be like.”

“How to see a vampire in three easy steps: 1. Get up. 2. Find a mirror. 3. Look at your first vampire.”