“There's no chance we could get arrested, is there?"I looked up at my best friend in the world. "If there is a law against an eight foot tall stork in wedge-padrilles carying a poorly dressed wooden grandma dummy as if it was her child, then yes, we might have a problem."Daisy rested her elbow on top of my head. "Oh you little peanut, I know you said something because I saw your rubbery lips flapping but I couldn't hear a word from way down there. Why don't you inflate those tiny lungs and try again?”

“[Nick] brushed the crumbs from his hands and then looked me right in the eye. "Kate," he began, "You are my cousin, and I love you, and I will always, always, always run you over without a second thought to get to a woman with a whole lot of cash.”

“Sugar,” Jake said, “I’ve wanted you since the first time you sassed me.”“I wanted to punch you in the nose.”He laughed and kissed her forehead. “My advertising skills left something to be desired.”“You rooked three unsuspecting women.”“I know.” He kissed her lips, taking his time. “I’m offering you a chance for payback.”“And that payback is sex?” He smelled awesome, like a hot, sexy man who’d been in a kitchen trying to please her. Or maybe please himself. With Jake, you never knew.He pulled her tighter against him, kissing her slowly, thoroughly. “I’d do my damnedest to make you a happy woman the second time I sold you something.”Sugar looked into Jake’s eyes. He was too hot, too sexy, almost taking her breath away. “I think your gravy’s burning.”“Nice try. I turned it off.” He tugged her hips against him, kissing her as if he’d never tasted anything as good as her mouth. Sugar moaned and let Jake hike her up on his waist. “If I’m moving too fast, say so. I’ll back off and feed you the best shrimp and steak dinner you’ve ever had. Just good friends breaking bread together.”Sugar gasped as Jake sank his teeth gently into her lower lip. Heat and warmth filled her, stealing her desire to tell him no about anything. “I’m not really that hungry.”His smile turned dangerous. “I am.”

“Taryn Mitchell," he said, looking me in the eyes. "I love you. With all my heart."I felt all the blood rush from my body and surge right into my chest. All this time I waited for a man to say those words to me and mean it, and now I was hearing them from the one person I had hoped would say them. I gazed into his eyes and said what was in my heart. It was as easy and natural as breathing. "I love you too - more than anything in this world.”

“I only hope that one day I can frighten my daughter this much. Right now, she's not scared of my husband or me at all. I think it's a problem. I was a freshman home from college the first time my dad said, "You're going out at ten p.m.? I don't think so," and I just laughed and said, "It's fine." I feel like my daughter will be doing that to me by age six.How can I give her what Don Fey gave me? The gift of anxiety. The fear of getting in trouble. The knowledge that while you are loved, you are not above the law. The Worldwide Parental Anxiety System is failing if this many of us have made sex tapes.”

“I was ten years old. I had noticed something was weird earlier in the day but I knew from commercials that one's menstrual period was a blue liquid that you poured like laundry detergent onto maxi pads to test their absorbency. This wasn't blue so...I ignored it for a few hours. When we got home I pulled my mom aside to ask if it was weird I was bleeding in my underpants. She was very sympathetic but also a little baffled. Her eyes said "Dummy didn't you read 'How Shall I Tell My Daughter ". I HAD read it but nowhere in the pamphlet did anyone say that your period was NOT a blue liquid. At that moment two things became clear to me I was now technically a woman and I would never be a doctor.”

“Champagne?" Carl asked."You know we don't drink champagne, Carl." Ricky laughed."Yes, but I don't think it's polite in mixed company to gulp down glasses of blood.”