“You can not serve two masters..but you can make both fight for you.”

“Smartass Disciple: Master, can you trust this bank to keep your money safe?Master of Stupidity: Well, I can put a bit less distrust on this bank than others.”

“Smartass Disciple: Master, if you are so good, can you drive a car with your eyes closed?Master of Stupidity: Thou shall not break the rules of drive safely.Thou shall not tempt the police as well.”

“Smartass Disciple: My master, please show me how to be a wise man!Master of Stupidity: I can't. But I can show you how to do something wisely.”

“When two evil guys fight in a duel,the worst of both will be the winner.”

“Smartass Disciple: Master, how do I know that I am not dreaming right now ?Master of Stupidity: You don’t. Only those who see you're dreaming can tell it.”

“Smartass Disciple: Master, where will you go after your soul leaves your body?Master of Stupidity: What makes you think a soul will go elsewhere physically?”