“Poor kid-- all she’d wanted to do was get her teeth fixed. ”

“It wasn’t human nature to leave things alone. It was normal for people to try to fix things that didn’t need to be fixed; or, infinitely worse, trying to fix things that were broken, because some things are meant to be broken--”

“An idiot will do anything, no matter how stupid, because he is afraid of what everybody will think of him if he does nothing. A genius, on the other hand, is content to do nothing, no matter what people think, if he can’t find anything worth doing.”

“UNDERTAKER!” the head boomed. “BOY, DO I HAVE A JOB FOR YOU!”

“You have to figure that there is something seriously wrong with somebody who wants to enter a profession that deals with whether people are screwing enough. Dealing with spirits, spooks, and demons almost seemed normal.”

“Never believe what they say; they always lie. I have a saying: Whatever they say, do the opposite, and you’ll never go wrong.”

“Do you realize how hard it is to keep your mind clear when somebody’s telling you to keep your mind clear?”